Of incorrigible partners

Print this poster and put it up on your bathroom mirror. May be, it’ll help?

 

Anything that is not in front of you, or on a messy table, can’t be declared ‘lost’. You can try looking into neat, well kept draws, where things are supposed to be kept. Just so that everyday, for half an hour in the morning, you need not lose you car keys, wallet, access cards, home keys, and find it anyway. Better still, get back home and leave you stuff in the draw, a place you know, you will find them, next morning.

You imagine every phone call from your partner to be an enquiry about the time you’d be back that evening. So the minute you pick the phone, you say you are in a meeting. Have you ever thought of a possibility that the call was perhaps to tell you that she loves you very much.

Every Saturday need not be spent on grocery shopping. At times, the fridge is loaded with vegetables that you won’t eat, but will buy anyway. That’s fine you know. Just ensure you get the stuff and rack them in places, like normal human beings do. Don’t stuff them up.

You do not live in a boys hostel anymore. If you change into your shorts, the trouser and shirt you’ve taken off, needs to be put  back on to a hanger, and hung inside a wardrobe. However, if you wish to leave them on the floor anyway, why don’t you hire some help from those Smith or whoever, the cleaning guys.

The terrace is not your personal ashtray.

Have you ever noticed the mugs arranged under the mirror in the bathroom? They are not beer mugs. They are meant for toothbrushes. Now that you know, you perhaps will care to please put back yours in it, starting tomorrow morning?

Vacuum cleaning the house, is not your partner’s birth right. You could try it sometimes too, you know. Its fun.

Your partner is not a cleanliness freak. Your partner likes to maintain a beautiful home for you. It is when stuffing toys back into the toy box 30 times a day and collecting your clothes from the loo, study, bedroom and from strategic corners, makes her a complete freak.

You like quoting – the world’s best cooks are men. How about trying to become one?

A home has more than 2 mugs to break monotony and for guests who like hot chocolate, coffee and tea. Not because you like leaving them in strange places, because there more mugs anyway.

How come nudging and pushing don’t wake you? But a subtle tring on the Goddamn blackberry does?

Has your tea loving partner ever said NO to tea in all those years you’ve known each other? Then, why why why ask?

Your partner cooks, cleans, dusts, scrubs, loves, writes, smiles, socialises, praises, plays, gyms, paints. Its perfectly okay if she can’t drive. Driving is not a virtue.

Its amazing how dirty you are, but still prefer wearing ironed tees and shorts. Just remember, someone does it for you.

OK, so you’ve made your partner brekky. Great. But why expect praises for the rest of the bloody year? For toast and butter??!

 

But despite all this, we continue to want you in our lives because we love you, you incorrigible creatures.