The evil Burger

The stacked piece of junk sat on the kitchen counter. And to make itself look less criminal, there lurked a bottle of orange juice behind it. The snob walked in for the fourth time looking at it. This time, she had a decided, firm look. She turned back and opened the refrigerator and took out a box, that looked stuffed with a whole lotta green looking stuff. She was just about to chuck the fat old fellow into the fridge, when it shrieked. “Hey! Listen. I know I ain’t the best looking thing around..I don’t have those fancy sesame seeds on my head, and I am all white. But, know what? I ain’t as bad as your gym teacher described me to be. I have a lil green sticking outta me….see? And the lil chic patty inside me is oven baked, so good for your heart, you, see? And the sheet of cheese, she is a lean babe, I know, I can smell her out…she is 90% fat free. Besides, what is that green mess you are planning on eating?”

 

The snob not able to believe what she just heard, glared at it, chucked it into the fridge and turned to leave. This time, it spoke in a  – I know you better than you think- kinda tone:

“Look here babe, stop pretending. In exactly an hour from now, you’ll come running back to me, and gobble me up like a goblin. So, before I get all soggy and sad, just pick me up, will you? Fool. Go on. whatcha waitin fo??”

 

She smiled, an embarrassed smile, and looked around, to see if there was anyone eavesdropping on this scandalizing conversation. Hurriedly, she opened the fridge before she changed her mind for the fifth time. Dumped it on a plate, perched herself on her couch. Bite after bite, she savoured it to her full satisfaction.

 

Burrrrp! “seeeee????? I told ya!”, the snob’s  tummy mocked.

 

An extra 10 minutes on the treadmill, promise promise promise. She muttered under her breath and hit the bed for a noon nap.